.....I think I will lay here a while..

A craze yet to hit Blighty (just like the use of crystal meth) Planking is happening all over the world. Last week I saw a picture of Hugh Hefner "planking" on his dining table... honestly, I thought he'd taken to much Viagra and ended up face down due engaging in "The Stranger"* technique...


The Beibs too has been spotted abet somewhat unsuccessfully giving it a horizontal splat..I mean what does a 17 year old raggamuffin know anyways*...ALOT less than my subject of this evening followers....Introducing.........wait for it....

PLONKING PUSS

This cat isn't a "planker" he is as you can see more of a ginger biscuit "Plonker".  Before you all rush with your hundreds of comments I know what plonker colloquially means.. and I don't mean it in that way....how could I.. I haven't meet this puss.. in fact while I am it, I took a request, Here's to you Russell Harrison - here is your beast!! So, PLONKING PUSS is a lovable, uncomplicated meow who spends his days whiskers down, paws strewn at the rear, front paws tucked somewhere I have no idea where... Ehhhh actually, this is a tad disconcerting... Maybe "Plonking Puss" should be "Stranger Puss".....Unless Russell you didn't tell me Jasper (his real meow name) has to use wheels for his front legs pulled by mice... and they are on their break!! 

On Scale, this is Boris

Have you ever seen something from afar and thought "DAM, that's big"... and then stood near it and felt somewhat ripped off at the scale it it. To elaborate I mean the size in actual reality  wasn't that big, just the distance and proportions were not correct.

Well, I have (no suprises) and in this instance it is Boris. I can't give Boris a name because obviously he has one. I know this because of CATBOOK. Yeap, when we moved into our flat we did a search of the local paws and Boris is a neighbour...He ruled the roost, until Lua turned up. Lua is twice his size and with his side kick Bettie, Boris just doesn't stand a chance.. even if Lua and Bettie are not allowed to stalk the fence on their own....

Sorry Boris, you are indeed a handsome puss but when it comes to being the manor's number one meow.. you lose out!! Don't fret, vocally you are the King and may I suggest if you want to taunt the former two sit on the back fence and yoddle your lungs..

And...he ponders.

Ahhhh the life of the Ginger Cat. Often regarded as the more fool hardy and independent of moggies the Ginger Cat does of course, seemingly more than most run across neighbours garden fences, rough house with fellow beasts of the backyards and sing in the evening chorus...All these opportunities are great and I would assume my own little fluffies would be jealous..However there is a big BUT!...What life does the Ginger Cat really want?
Walking to an appointment this morning I crossed the path of who I shall call "Ponder Puss". Looking somewhat forlorn, he gazes out of the first flat window. We catch each other’s  eyes ever so briefly. I begin to think…. “What does he dream of?”  Are his dreams of the day when in December he won’t be forced outdoors..a moment when the over preened Persian from the house behind takes a romantic view on their friendship? Does “Ponder Puss” want not only to have the freedom  he is associated with, but the lapcat nature of indoor cats…

Whatever “Ponder Puss” is thinking about I'm sure it's about something soulful...meaningful...and not at all what we'd think!

Viva Las Kitty and Craps!

I bet you all thought that after New York that Las Vegas would have nothing to offer in the way of felines, Guess What? You are mistaken. As it goes tonight after a loss at the slot machines at The Venetian we tried to find a way  to escape, but we came across..what for it......Venetian Puss..Now Y'all it's too simple a name to call stuffed porcelain cats "venetian puss" so lets go with "WHAT THE HELL CREEPY Masked BEAST Puss".....it really is odd, and now very much on par with  "Eyes Wide Shut" starring the even odder couple at the time Tom and Nicole....I imagine these "puss's" coming alive at night, putting curses on roulette, having group "romance" on the craps tables and to make it even sicker.... laying on your bed as you sleep at The Venetian platting your hair and trying to dress you in frills.... So as a result my recommendation whilst in Vegas is avoid staying at The Venetian.....I suggest you try Hooters, that way the only thing on your bed is the vomit from the night before after a bucket of buffalo wings!

Prison Cats Need to Escape.

What does New York offer that North London doesn't? Well alot you might respond with - and I would agree. This hit the biblical "heart string" home when today we ventured into what has to be crack for pet owners. It was a pet store on Broadway. No dancing bears or wobbly elephants wanting to kill but LOADS of pet treats, beds, grooming tools and now..... now I will tell you.. CATS!!! Yes - real CATS. The saddening aspect to this is that the cats in question where homeless and abandoned pusscats. 

If you dump an animal here the crime (see the word crime) is punishable by one year in prison. TAKE THAT YOU JERKS. However, there were over a dozen cats on display in jail like conditions with a pleading old crone almost throwing cats into the hands of people making cooey noises at them. She didn't approach me but I would assume it was because I already was carrying enough cat paraphernila to know better. 

So may I introduce you to 2 adorable 1 year meows. They're names escape me... so they will be called "Licky Tuxedo Puss" and "TILAM Puss" (take it like a man)... They were just adorable and I could have taken every cat with me.... alas, lets be honest. I am one cat away from smelling like a puss urinenal. Don't judge me....

ps. Does anyone know how to make the font size back to normal on a MacBook?

Lick Me Like you Love it!

Pauly Brown Town.......

It is quite fitting that tonight I add what has to be the ultimate "you have to meet him to love him" cat as my boyfriend and I are departing for a US jaunt for 10 days...When travelling to America, you have to see it to love it. America is great, well... California is and so is New York....(Brooklyn, lets be clear on that and I hear some Southern States are pretty amazing too) and now I love both of those places because I have been there... just as I have "been there" (not in the biblical sense oooooh grose) with PBT.

This cat is breath taking... and he loves a good mooch. Never mind is gangling features or odd shaped face... and he was just a kitten when this was taken and I am sure thsi Havana Brown has grown into a sleeker proportioned puss. I just want to high five PBT and the author of the soon to be "Cats of Collingwood"....

Miss you Both!

French? Maybe just keeping it real in Shoreditch!

 
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! this is NOT a cat I have seen, and it saddens me to no end.... My wonderful Boyfriend spotted this puss on his way home from boozing in Old Street.... Apparently this cat was very friendly and if given the chance, said boyfriend would have cat napped... that is not to sleep people.. but to steal.


What an attractive feline. It is kinda bad to give him the name of "Skunk Puss" but.... skunks are so pretty.... so lets call him "Pepe Le Pew' Puss..... Lets hope he doesn't try and sexualise skunks..


What a spectacular addition to Cats of North London!

MMmmmmmmmMmmarmite and MmmmmmmmmMilk

So yes! Look who it is! "Marmite & Milk" Puss just smooching around the Royal Mail letter box, then a pole.... then a scurry away from the camera!.... "RUN MM Puss"..... It;s evident that cats are prevalent in North London.... and there are so many more to be captured and treated as Gods.....Treat your cat like a God - be an Egyptian. 

Night Puss, came out this morning!

Lilac Wine.....

The mornings have been just amazing. No need for leather jackets and only a need for sunglasses and a "can do" walk to the station..It really has been inspiring. So as I was walking this morning I glanced to my right and saw "Marmite and Milk" Puss. I usually see him at night, so to see him this morning was a delight. I think I usually called him "brown tuxedo" puss.. but having a good look at him this morning, he's not brown... but a variety of motled browns... imagine adding milk to marmite.. so now he is "marmite and milk"...  He looked most unimpressed.. but he was standing next to lilacs...they are a bit woofey.

But yes, next time I see you MM.... make sure you greet me with a purrrrrrrr and some toast.

On the Prowl Puss, epic success or failure?

As per my usual walk to work I keep a keen eye out for any felines that are around..I have been disappointed of late and I was beginning to think that winter had sucked them all into a vaccum of laying on the sofa and meowing for extra Dreamies whilst watching Kerry Katona... but no. Last week I saw this. I will call him "Prowl Puss".

Sky Rat was rambling across the road with not a care in the world...unsuspecting Sky Rat has no idea "Prowl Puss" was doing the head down, bum wiggle. I wanted to stay and see how it all ended.... But I pretty much figured that it was going to end in failure. Not suggesting the cat in question is a loser, but after spending all winter on the sofa watching television Prowl Puss is carrying a few extra grams of Dreamies... Plus, with Kerry Katona still running across his brain it was always going to end in an epic fail.

Angels do fall from the sky...

.....When gazing onto the yonder from the bus window, often an angel is spotted. These "angels" are masked at Louboutin heels....a crusty yet soft croissant from Pauls....my goodness an angel can be spotted in the form of a deep filled glass of rouge after said bus ride...(God only knows you need out sometimes with all the scruff that occurs or travels alongside you)....
Then there are the real angels.......these little things don't willingly wear booties....nor chomp on crossaints.....and only crave dehydrated shrimp after a hard day......that's right folks.....THEY'RE FELINES..and what a beauty this one is......all fluffy and encapsulating the purity of all things wonderful....
Yes Brucie....you fell from Meow Heaven and squished bang into our hearts.....now can you not poop in shoes......

She just gets cuter.....

But shame this beast likes at 5:30am start every morning except weekends....

Some people have sun wake up lamps...others wake up to hiddeous iphone vibrations....goodness, I'm sure there is the stock standard casio watch...but we....we wake to Bettie most mornings....chirping, purring....grunting....pawing...yeap...she's a genuine feline alarm...

Don't get me wrong...The cuddles are unbelievable...so sweet and needy. Alas when I get out bed the little blight jumps straight into my spot...nestling, chirping....purring.

I am beginning to think is an evil ploy....hmmmmm?

Boom Boom Likes to Paw

After walking past AWD Puss this morning, I felt bad that I just had no time to mooch hello - gladly, he gave me a token eye and turned into a drive... I am alright this this - I knew I had a hectic day ahead...
So the day past and I only mentioned once I had cats. Which is getting better.

But yes, I came home to my delightful meows and our Boom Boom is utterly gorgeous....Her paws are clipped now thankfully... she hurts. Ask the lizard.

Missed train but meet "AWD Puss"

Yes.
I missed my train this morning that I had specially planned to make...even accounted for a visit to Sainsburys for my over priced salad and runner beans....
It went something like this....I was speedily walking to walk, giving an approving eye to the man who was using a bag to collect his dog fowl and just as I passed him there it was....
A vision in absolute ginger.
"awwww hello puss puss" as he ran out....instantly noticing he didn't have a collar I always think the worst, but this pussycat was indeed thick and well feed....

My romp with the meow completely side tracked my journey...it ess now all about snapping him and embracing him lavish pats and coos.

As you can see, out of 10 pics only 2 could be posted..our little man was all about affection. It struck me as needy, but as we are all aware cats like it whenever THEY want it and it was AWD Puss's time.

AWD Puss?
Anyone
Will
Do.......

Which was evident as I needed to race off and he began to follow me in ernest...
"no puss....you can't come to work and there are just no cuddles left"

I must have looked insane to lady walking towards the corner....but at least she intrigued AWD Puss and he left me to pursue any possible affection from another.....

It might be worth adding I gave AWD Puss a male sex....this is because he reminds me of Brucie....king of the indoor gingered... It could well have been a girly girl....

I smell curry....now I wasn't expecting that....hmmmmm hungry.

In Malaysia....no Hello Kitties.

So I'm in Transit in Malaysia Land...its not a sunny tropical morning....the duty free is inflating my shopping ego and I've not seen one Cheesy Hello Kitty. I have seen stuffed Harrods meows and some ginger fluff stuffed object at the M&M shop...but nothing bright...cheery or embracing my inner need for a visual kitteh pick me up....
Bite me Virgin Active!
Rightio. Here's my view at the moment.....

I know they are not in the locality, but I might make a concession!

The entire reason I started this just the other day, was because for almost a year I have been obsessing about the local felines. Alas, since I lack the photographic proof of their existance, I will add random images of cats that make me go "ooooooh". This way, I get my fix and out there people can view a dedicated blog to the "ooooh" meow feeling.

I suppose for the last year, my obsession with cats has increased ten fold - that is not 8 new cats (I WISH) but I notice them more than ever.... from webistes, to youtube - to the felines of friends... I am 100% committed to being a Crazy Cat lady, sans wee.

Cats Make Me Weird

I spend half my nights sleep being pawed...Not by anything exotic..but a long haired feline who has mother issues!

This isn't "smogpuss"!

So, I have decided to document all the lovely felines in my area of North London. It's not like I don't have anything better to do, because I do.... It's just that they are such a lovely bunch of fluffy sacks that I thought they needed to be thrown onto the world wide web!

Today's puss isn't really a pussycat in my neighbourhood. But I was unable to find original pictures of smog puss because.... my iphone died and along it pictures of said "smogpuss".

He is called "smogpuss" because he is incredibly fluffy and white, with smudges on his fur. Said puss is outstandingly proud in appearance and I totally dig is nonchalant ways.

There are several cats about and they are hard to photograph.....so I might actually just draw the little bastards!

But yes.... CATS RULE BITCHES!!